The 20 Things I Learned After 20 Years of Marriage

This week we focus on marriage in anticipation of National Marriage Week and of course, Valentine’s Day. We invite you to consider our authors’ insights and comment with your own.

By: Deacon Marques Silva

Twenty years ago today, I married my beautiful bride Christine Lynn.

We dated for two and a half years, after which I proposed, and waited a year until we were married in Libertytown, Md., at St. Peter the Apostle Catholic Church. We now have four children: Nicholas, 19, Hannah, 16, Victoria, 13, and Noah, 10, to whom we have committed to live long enough to spoil their children.


This morning, I found myself staring at the ceiling in the early morning hours (1 a.m. to 3 a.m.). I took some time to reflect on the last 20 years to discover what has made this marriage successful. For all those engaged couples, I thought I would share 20 insights for 20 years in no particular order except for the numero uno. And to all the married couples who are reading this: can I get an Amen!?

  • Invite the Lord to play an active role in your marriage – Life is difficult enough and the blending of two lives needs all the grace it can get if there is a chance for the marriage to succeed. The family that prays together, stays together.
  • Don’t expect to change your spouse – It doesn’t work and it only fills both hearts with bitterness and betrayal. What you see is what you get. And let’s be honest, who is crazier . . . View the full text here.

This post first appeared on Encourage and Teach  on June 18, 2014.

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